Finding the perfect bridal party is one of the most challenging aspects of planning a wedding – in my opinion. Maybe it’s because I have a natural talent for planning, but asking key people in your life to play a role in your big day is a pretty big step. Below are some tips for choosing a bridal party that will #slay!

1. Don’t rush – It’s easy to want all of your friends, sisters/hermanas, cousins/primas, and even close co-workers to be a part of your big day. Don’t. Ask yourself – Has thing person been there for me? My relationship? Will we be as close in 5-10 years as we are now? Who are they to me?

2. Be realistic and honest – Will they be helping with the planning? Is it important for them to help address envelopes, package favors, help you find a wedding dress? Are the able to commit with their schedules?

3. Be mindful of your wedding size – Not everyone has 300 people coming to their wedding or eight (yes, 8!) bridesmaids. If you’re having an intimate wedding or less than 100 people, you might want to reconsider to 8 bridesmaids.

4. Break gender roles! I won’t lie – some of my best friends in high school and college were guys. Don’t be afraid to have a Man-of-Honor (or Best Woman).

5. When choosing your MOH and BM, choose responsibly. You’ll rely on them for some major tasks, holding onto your wedding bands, and emotional support (trust me, best decision I’ve made!). It’s also a plus if they are able to make decisions for you and you’re totally okay with it.

6. Don’t feel obligated to include kids. Do you really want or need a flower girl or ring bearer? Probably not. It’s less stress for you anyway.

7. Take the groom/bride into consideration. Just do it. Does he/she want a huge bridal party? Is there anyone in particular they ~really~ want in the bridal party? Will you both be comfortable with that decision?

8. Is she BM/GM material? I’ve been battling this for the longest because what is BM/GM material? Well, if they’re never on time, not supportive, or just aren’t responsive throughout your engagement, maybe you should re-think this person. It’s okay to say no or to tell them like it is.